A friend of a friend, and the very best tumblr I follow. 


Four Years.

I’ve always said that it seems like I’ve known you for longer, and that’s true, but I’ll be damned if this year didn’t fly by me. It’s not that nothing changed. Everything changed. Our address changed twice, the way we eat, the people we see on a daily basis, the length of our conversations. You grew up right in front of me this year. I guess it’s true that this happens every year, but you seem like such a kid now. There’s not an ounce of toddler left in you. 

Ever since you were born I’ve been calling you my best friend. I’ve never felt more connected to any human. You definitely lived up to that title this year. We stood together while your dad was gone, and we readjusted when he returned. There were pre-naptime gigglefests and all kinds of inside fort building as we tried our best to avoid the Oklahoma heat this summer. You had a particularly hard time moving away from your grandparents. I looked forward to being away from that town so much that I never stopped to consider how much you may hate it. You still talk about Fulton street and the way your hair would fly when we’d walk across the Mississippi. 

There were all kinds of changes last year, and I don’t know what’s in store for us this year. I cannot promise consistency and I do not know what the future holds for us. But, I do know that we will always have this love. I never want a day to go by where you question exactly how much I adore everything about you. I met you, my daughter, earlier in my life than I had planned. I didn’t know I’d have so much growing up to do while you were around. I could say that I’m done. I could promise you that I’m totally matured, but that’d be completely naive. We can grow together. 

The second that they put you on my chest and you looked up at us with those olive eyes I knew nothing else about my life would ever matter as much as the way it fit around your life. You are forever my first priority and that will never not be the case. I’ve spent my entire adult life trying to figure out the best way to raise you. I haven’t been perfect, but I could not possibly be more proud of the way you’re turning out. Sometimes I look at you and my chest hurts with pride. And it’s not just because you’re beautiful, although you are undeniably gorgeous. It’s all your words and your compassion and even your affinity for skeletons and black olives. It’s the way you’ve always went about your life like there was no such thing as fear. As scary as it is that I know you have no qualms about jumping into the deep end of the pool without any regard for your safety, I will always admire your courage. There isn’t a thing about you that doesn’t make my heart swell. 

It was 2AM in January of 2007 when I first found out that I was going to be a mother.  I could never have imagined that terrifying little plus sign would turn out to be the best thing that could have ever happened to me. Thank you for that, Scarfish. Thanks for being exactly the way you are. Here’s to 4, and 5 and 16 and 28 and to never settling for anything less than what you deserve. And, you deserve everything. 

11:18 am, reblogged by caryline

Watched Benjamin Button on FX today. Sometimes I think I’m too emotional.

4:48 pm, by caryline

Be the Light.

It’s been a while (ok, a long while) since I’ve tumbled. But I’ve come across a wonderful thought and I wanted to share. I work with a few hundred volunteers raising money for the American Cancer Society. Through my job, I come across some amazing people— cancer survivors, caregivers, supportive family & friends. My co-worker, Dana, has a friend who is currently battling breast cancer and I follow her blog. She’s been sick, bald, upset, angry…I haven’t even met her before, but the things she writes are so inspiring. Here is something she shared yesterday.

To conclude this, a lesson for all, is to be conscious of how draining negativity can be. It is infectious and has the potential to be one of the strongest magnets in the universe. When you allow yourself to dwell on a negative thought, that thought leads to another unconstructive thought, leading to another, and another… When you allow yourself to be sucked into what many refer to as “drama” or “gossip” or even the news in the media today pounding us with what’s wrong with everyone and everything, you begin to, whether consciously or unconsciously, focus on those stories which ultimately takes your energy from optimism to pessimism.

For just a second, think about all of the negativity you encounter in a day’s time. That cash register attendant who is having a bad day and is rude to you, the newspaper headlining nothing but bad news, a colleague or friend who never seems to have anything good to say, and then there are your own thoughts that sneak in when you least expect them. Stop thinking about all that negativity!! LOL. Now challenge yourself to be conscious of when your energy is starting to drain because of the lack of optimism around you and redirect your thinking. You can still be a friend, you can still listen, just don’t let yourself fall victim to the infection of pessimism. Be the light.

And so I thank God for every day I have and for putting me in a position, such as in a school system, where I can help others, hopefully influence others as they find their direction in life and with healthy outlook. While this is almost difficult to say, I am grateful for the wakeup call I’ve been given. I put this quote on my Facebook page yesterday, “Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things” (~Robert Brault). I have been so driven educationally and professionally, and I have been so busy “working” and just getting by each day,… I really believe that I’ve been given a chance to truly understand what this quote means before “it’s too late.”

A woman battling cancer who has every right to be so pissed at the world, but somehow isn’t. It’s so inspiring to me.

Check this out :)

12:09 pm, by caryline



The camera sold. Now I just have to wait for payment…which has been the tricky bit throughout.

I would really like to be done with this disaster.

CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!! Finally :)

11:31 am, reblogged by caryline

Not dead.

I kind of died.


I think I might buy a house in Sioux City.

Being a grown-up is sometimes scary, but house searching has been pretty fun :)

11:31 am, by caryline
tagged: Sioux City,


1:30 pm, by caryline

Bahaha, this cracks me up :)

1:53 pm, reblogged by caryline

SUX roads

There are seriously so many things I like about Sioux City. I actually enjoy living here. One thing I do not like though, is that they SUCK at plowing residental streets! It was the first big snow of the year on Saturday, and my street is still an absolute mess.

I wish my car had a snow plow on the front. Can you attach one of those to a Nissan Versa? hahahhaa.

5:17 pm, by caryline
tagged: Sioux City, snow, SUX, literally,

"You all know that I have been sustained throughout my life by three saving graces – my family, my friends, and a faith in the power of resilience and hope. These graces have carried me through difficult times and they have brought more joy to the good times than I ever could have imagined. The days of our lives, for all of us, are numbered. We know that. And, yes, there are certainly times when we aren’t able to muster as much strength and patience as we would like. It’s called being human.

"But I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious. And for that I am grateful. It isn’t possible to put into words the love and gratitude I feel to everyone who has and continues to support and inspire me every day. To you I simply say: you know."

from Elizabeth Edwards’ Facebook about her battle with cancer (CNN)